Making the Grade

I thoroughly enjoyed not studying for finals in December.[1] But I realized that suddenly not having grades to measure my abilities and progress is definitely a huge shift in my personal motivation. My entire life has revolved around earning grades until this point. And now, no one is grading me.

Sure, I’ll have performance evaluations. But that is significantly different. I have projects to work on and tasks to complete. But, the measurement of how I perform is on a scale completely foreign to me. I honestly have no idea if my supervisors are satisfied with the work I’m producing. The only feedback I have received so far is completely informal. Where is the 90% mark? Is 90% enough for a satisfactory job? It seems like I should be shooting for 100%.

As I sit in my cubicle at my first full time job and passed the internship mark[2] of past employment endeavors, I really have no idea how to navigate “the real world.”  What am I doing with my life? Is this job going to sustain me - both financially and intellectually?

And still the ever present question: What do I want to do with the rest of my life?

I could really use a 5-year plan right about now. But it seems like the "big goals" are things that I'm not really sure how to plan for. I'd like to buy a house within the next 5 years, but if I'm living in DC, who knows if that will ever happen... I'd really like to figure out what I want out of life and how I want to spend my time and resources.  

I think my next step will be figuring out smaller things that I want to do - the projects I will take on. Do I want to learn how to garden this year? Do I want to take up painting? Or rock climbing? Basically, I need a new hobby to broaden my interests and take my mind off the fact that getting on the honor roll isn't really something I can work toward.          

---

[1] I didn’t enjoy having only 3 days off from work. I could have taken annual leave, but I’m saving up those precious days for a real vacation. To where, I’m not 100% certain yet…

[2] I have now worked at my job longer than a typical internship would last – roughly a 10 week to 4 month timeframe